Tuesday, June 24, 2008
10:05 PM | 
Posted by
Ms. Chink |
Me. This is me. Not perfect by any means, but meant for great things as you see. Gifted with expression to leap the bounds of limitation. Across whatever bridges were doubted. Mistakes, ofcourse they’ve been made. Skies both blue and gray shades. I can laugh at the jokes and mistakes. But as free as it seems there’s still a weight of suppression. I want it lifted, or more so untangled.
This spool of what is yet to come or what can’t be for whatever reason. I need to be new… revived from the unconscious mind that led me into this rut. I feel like I once knew me and now I’ve lost sight of that. Or did I ever know? What I defined myself by could have only been perpetuated by patterns of norm. Mainstream trivia that I memorized forth and back. I’m straddling the line. I see who I am, and what I want… or wait is that what I should be running from?
Now I’m confused. Just when I think I’m on the right track some outlying factor knocks me back in to reality. Now I can relate Amy. Futile tears bludgeoned by this mess. Melodic pressures… too many fools to deal with. Not enough patience to explain why. Just want to hear nothing… for a while atleast… but wait, I need my music. What else could serves as therapeutic artistry? Atleast can I have that for inspiration. Just give me my pen and paper, and let me cruise as “Frank” blares in the background. Or Amel… perhaps her rhythm can provide a middle ground for my aggressive repression.
Emulating sometimes even the very same things I loathe. Not wanting anyone to speak up when I fall off. Time to set some boundaries… but wait… that’s the very thing I hate. Limits. But is it safe for me to live without them.
“My destructive side has grown a mile wide.” No fixing it now… can’t patch up a dam already burst. So I guess I have to deal with it. Deal with me.
Fix the problems when they come. Try to avoid them when they’re not there
This spool of what is yet to come or what can’t be for whatever reason. I need to be new… revived from the unconscious mind that led me into this rut. I feel like I once knew me and now I’ve lost sight of that. Or did I ever know? What I defined myself by could have only been perpetuated by patterns of norm. Mainstream trivia that I memorized forth and back. I’m straddling the line. I see who I am, and what I want… or wait is that what I should be running from?
Now I’m confused. Just when I think I’m on the right track some outlying factor knocks me back in to reality. Now I can relate Amy. Futile tears bludgeoned by this mess. Melodic pressures… too many fools to deal with. Not enough patience to explain why. Just want to hear nothing… for a while atleast… but wait, I need my music. What else could serves as therapeutic artistry? Atleast can I have that for inspiration. Just give me my pen and paper, and let me cruise as “Frank” blares in the background. Or Amel… perhaps her rhythm can provide a middle ground for my aggressive repression.
Emulating sometimes even the very same things I loathe. Not wanting anyone to speak up when I fall off. Time to set some boundaries… but wait… that’s the very thing I hate. Limits. But is it safe for me to live without them.
“My destructive side has grown a mile wide.” No fixing it now… can’t patch up a dam already burst. So I guess I have to deal with it. Deal with me.
Fix the problems when they come. Try to avoid them when they’re not there
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About Me
- Ms. Chink
- I'm Asia Jones a current grad student who recently graduated from Lincoln university with two BS degrees in criminal justice & sociology and two minors in anthropology and psychology. My ideal career is to become a US Marshall. I feel that I have overcome alot of tribulations in my life which has mode me into the women I am today. I am women of passion who loves to attain knowledge. I am very into Afrocentricity. Writing my feelings is my life and I hope that my word inspires others going though the same situations.
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